Summer lovin'

The only light that is left in this evening is that which glows in a reminiscence of the day, in each molecule of air.  It isn't real like a fire, but more of an ember which is just enough to mesmerize you with its fading magnificence.  The pine trees' limbs are so still tonight as there is no breeze to speak of.  The crickets seem almost distant since the air is so stagnant, disallowing their song to sway across it and dance with me. This feeling of a summer night just never gets old.


This nostalgic summer love returned me to a place when I was just five years old.  After dinner was done and we had laboriously scrubbed and polished the dishes, mopped the floor, and returned everything in the house to its proper place, we knew the day's real excitement would begin.  The calls of "Red Light, Green Light, 1,2,3...", "Mother may I take two giant umbrella, elephant steps?", and my very favorite, "Red rover, red rover, we call Laura over..." would already be underway in the street beneath our apartment.  The giddy laughter, the squeals of delights and the carnival sound of the ice cream truck nearing, were all a prelude to the nights later offerings- the cricket songs and the lightning bug splendors.

This, was what we spent our days dreaming about.  What could be better than this? was often interrupted by my angry mother scolding me for leaving fingerprints or breathing condensation, on her impeccably clean windows.  She preferred that I did not watch so closely, the children down on the street, having fun.  She preferred, I think, that I would just sit in my room and never notice those things that were not my options.

After weeks of pleading and begging, one day she finally let us go down to play with the others.  The game of choice that evening was Red Rover.  There was nothing that could have delighted me more.  It hadn't occurred to me when I had watched from above, that I wouldn't be good at that game.  But really, how can a five year old, thirty pound body break a chain of anything?  I waited and waited for my name to be called and then finally, it was!  It felt like the 4th of July and Christmas all rolled into one, with birthday sprinkles on top!  I summoned every ounce of faith and strength, with all of my will and determination as I went forging toward that defensive line.  I will never forget the feeling of freedom as I hurled my body against one of the biggest opponent's arms.  Okay, so at five my strategy wasn't so tight.  But that feeling was the bomb, and instead of letting me get hurt, he quickly scooped me up in his almost manly arms, and giggled with admiration for all of my effort.

Since I didn't break the chain, I was deemed part of a new team, the one that was so magnificent, it absorbed the raging giant spirit, little me.  I remembered being so proud to be there.  And then the magical music came closer and closer.  Turning to my mother, with begging eyes as the ice cream truck came to a stop in front of this massive cloud of children, she shook her head and then turned her eyes down.  My disappointment left me feeling as frozen and cold as a bomb pop.  As all of the children skipped away with their pockets full of chalk and jacks, I saw the ice cream man watching me.  He summoned me over to the truck once the last of the scatterers scooted, and he asked me what I wanted. Choking back some tears, I told him that I had no money, to which he reminded me, that was not what he asked.

There weren't a lot of nights that our mother would let us go play with the other children, but when we did, it was a magical night of miracles.  Nope, I don't think I'll ever tire of this love for summer nights. Although things haven't turned out quite the way I would have imagined, and certainly not the way that I strove for; I have front row seats to a magnificent choir of crickets, beneath my towering pines, in a galaxy of light that is so expansive that it sweeps me up and carries me away.  Nothing scrawny about that, huh?

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This night is too sweet to end.  I am exhausted from a day of relapsed pain and worry.  The worry is about things that I KNOW will be fine, but I'm a mom and I can't help it.

But this dark, dark night
sharpens my sight and
every star that I see seems
to be twinkling for me
the crickets unified throng
with my heart, plays along
it's like love's my new toy
and everything's joy
as the stars bend to kiss
doused in heaven's bliss
I am floating in waves
with ne'er a slight crave
for anything more
or anything less
in this moment, this evening
I am truly blessed
til my eyelids grow tight
to bid a sweet night
but my heart won't let go
of this sweet little glow
for the stars in my eyes
and the feel of this high...

Oh, but it IS a goooood night! Thank you, thank you, thank you!