I was standing in K Mart just a little
while ago, and saw some costumes hanging from the ceiling. One in
particular was a quite glitzy purple princess gown with golden
embellisments and a tall, conical hat, of course. It reminded me of
being little, when fantasy and magic could sweep me away to a place
that was so incredible that it could not possibly have been unreal.
There have been times in my life when real life has felt just that
good.
For a minute I worried that it has been so long since I've felt that. Has life beaten me down so much that I just don't go there any more? Is the mask that I'm wearing hiding me from what I really want to be? Or am I simply hiding behind my fortress of fear, whose unquestionable presence never fails me, from life's greatest gifts?
In my book study/class last week we talked about how God wants nothing but the best for us and that God doesn't understand sin. How could he, if he is the true light of love? Love is not an obligation. Not real love, anyway- so God can be nothing but light. So WHY do I shrink away from thinking that I should have life's greatest happiness? God is not holding against me, or assessing penance, for the wrongs which I fear I must recompense.
How many times do I have to be here? Kinda' scary, huh?
For a minute I worried that it has been so long since I've felt that. Has life beaten me down so much that I just don't go there any more? Is the mask that I'm wearing hiding me from what I really want to be? Or am I simply hiding behind my fortress of fear, whose unquestionable presence never fails me, from life's greatest gifts?
In my book study/class last week we talked about how God wants nothing but the best for us and that God doesn't understand sin. How could he, if he is the true light of love? Love is not an obligation. Not real love, anyway- so God can be nothing but light. So WHY do I shrink away from thinking that I should have life's greatest happiness? God is not holding against me, or assessing penance, for the wrongs which I fear I must recompense.
How many times do I have to be here? Kinda' scary, huh?
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