My ninth life

it was a long road back
to "gone" again
and yet I'm here,
"never again"

there's a bird in the tree
sounding like
rubber twanging "meow"
on the faint, sun-stained pond
as he carefully chooses his dinner

melting into evening
I evaporate one last time
before the night awakens,
to bring me home once more


#yourekillingme

Implosion

This is that moment
the one I've seen in pictures
a million times inside my head

When I watched the ducks
the other day, gliding as if even
the disappearance of air could not free them more

They cried. I heard them
But I didn't know if they were
cries of pain or whimpers of surrender's pleasure

The only question in my mind
came from my heart when I demanded
to know their names

(What do you love, dear Laura?)
(Why must you name your pleasure?)
(Why must you name your pain?)

That is how it feels when love comes
And how it feels when love walks away
When you can open the door of your own heart

And wrestle with the pleasure
and fervently fuck the pain
all the while, feeling it all...

Knees knocking, heart thumping so hard
it pulls everything into its drain
And I get dizzy, wondering if I'm going to fall

But I'm here, Knowing what I Know
The wandering wonderer succumbing to wondrous
As she turns to let you go

It's like that moment, the one I've seen in pictures
There's a flash of light, separating every piece from every other
and then the building crumbles, and every question flees